Written by: Manaswi Sapkota - 26004, Grade IX
Posted on: 24 June, 2022
Kriti felt trapped in her school and even at her house she couldn’t be herself. She had kept this facade of being the “perfect” daughter and student in front of others. She lived in Nepal where she couldn’t express herself. She had this diary where she kept all of her secrets. The only thing she didn’t realize was that her mother occasionally read her diary.
One day after returning home from school she caught her mother reading her diary. She realized that her mother knew she was a lesbian. Kriti wasn’t ready to come out yet. She needed more time and finding out that her mother secretly read her diary made her feel less validated. She wasn’t ready to talk about being a lesbian yet. She decided to leave the house without her mother knowing she had caught her. She only came back in the evening pretending nothing happened and her mother did the same. Together all of them ate dinner and even laughed. Later at night, Kriti cried alone in her bed wondering if her dad knew and maybe even hated her. What if her mother also hated her? What if she was just waiting for Kriti to come out to kick her out of the house? This thought scared Kriti. She tried her best to sleep but couldn’t. At around 12:00 am, Kriti overheard her parents talking about her. She only heard her name and got curious about what they were talking about.
“I don’t think she’s ready yet,” said her mother.
“That’s fine she can take her time, she will eventually tell us,” Kriti’s father replied.
The conversation continued and the more she heard she realized that her parents supported her and were fine with her taking her time. She still didn’t like the fact that her mother read her diary as it made her feel like her coming out wasn’t relevant anymore. She decided to confront her parents after a few days, after she prepared herself. She talked to her girlfriend about coming out. Her girlfriend was very supportive of this decision and even offered to go with her.
So, on a Thursday evening she finally came out to her parents officially and even introduced her girlfriend. She also confronted them about how they read her diary and how that made her feel. They looked at her with a sorry expression and apologized. They realized their mistake. Kriti forgave them after a few days.
After coming out Kriti didn’t feel like she HAD to be perfect. She could be herself more. It wasn’t easy to stop pretending at first but soon she started living her life to the fullest. She came out her own time, in a way. Though things don’t always go as planned we can always turn things the way we want it.
