Written by: Samaya Shrestha - 20121, Grade XII
Posted on: 22 January, 2020
The beginning of manhood can only be seen in man after Bartamandha. It is a complex Hindu ceremony where boys of age between 8-12 years take the first steps in learning the traditional law, ceremonial roles and rituals of their caste. Before the ceremony boys wear traditional orange, headband pierced with a porcupine spice for the protection from evil. In Nepal, one cannot marry unless he has done bartamandha. It is performed by six Brahma priests, though technically two are only required. Red, white and yellow patterns are made around the fire for the protection and to mark an elaborate part setting, indicating where each god should sit as they join the ceremony. Pujas are performed to Ganesh and light and water.
There is a belief that if a guy doesn’t do a bartamandha before marriage, he can never be happy. It is also said that he can never have a baby. As there is a belief that evil roams around their marriage and never lets their marriage be successful. There is also another belief that if a guy doesn’t do bartamandha he is graded as a low caste. Even the high caste once you marry without bartamandha, he becomes untouchable. It is said that their karma will be incomplete and they can never live a normal life (i.e. sad marriage life, regarded as low people, never accepted in a society.)
I always had a question regarding this belief like why do evil surround you if you don’t cut your hair? How is cutting hair related to giving birth? Does the cutting of hair disturb our biological behavior? Why can’t we be called man unless we cut our hair? And why do we have to put a hairtail behind our head? And why only our maternal uncle is related to our karma as karma is related to bartamandha. There are so many ‘wh’ questions in my mind.
When I asked my mother about this tradition, she replied it’s what we’ve been following so many centuries ago. We have no right to question it. Then I asked her many questions then she shouted at me and said it is what it is! We have to follow it. Then I asked my father and then he replied I don’t know anything about it, it’s just that we follow it because everybody does so. And this is what our ancestors have been doing, they have taught us this, so why not. Why take a chance?
Then I realized that we don’t even know what we are doing. Most of us don’t even care and just so because that’s what our ancestors have been doing because that is what everybody is doing. We don’t even question it, because if we do so then we become “the spoiled one”. Everybody goes against us. We follow it out because of fear. We follow it because everybody does so. We are all blinded by our tradition. We should follow our tradition, take it as our pride but we should never be blind. We should question everything and believe only those which are reasonable and believable.
