Written by: Suvani Karki - 29055, Grade VII
Posted on: 11 March, 2024
“I’m sorry mom, I could not make you and dad proud. I finally understood life is Hard, yes it is.” These were the words written in the letter. Ava’s mom had found this letter under Ava’s bed’s pillow. Ava’s mom did not understand a word since she was not wearing her glasses. But when she did see the written words. She regretted it.
Ava was a 17 year old girl living happily with her family. Her father, Ramnath was a police officer, he often was posted near the valley. But for a few months, he had been posted to far districts. So, Ramnath decided that his family will not go where he goes. So, he called his family and told them to come to Kathmandu and live with Anjali and Ava. This was the first time Anjali and Ava had a permanent residence. They were not used to this. Ava always demanded to visit new places but, since in the absence of her father she could not.
Anjali was always occupied with her in-law’s. Anjali used to be so tired by the evening that the only thing she could think of was sleeping. Ava had her own room. A huge room. But usually, it's a bit messy. She used to get scolded by her mother but she didn’t care. She always wanted to be a model. A famous one. Who had her own car, a huge mansion and many more lavish items. But she never had the courage to say it to her parents. Anjali and Ramnath wanted their daughter to be a doctor or an engineer. But Ava’s wish was completely opposite.
28 January was Ava’s birthday but Ramnath could not make it. It was Ava’s 18th birthday. Ava had planned that she would tell her parents and her family about her passion but, since Ramnath was not there she didn’t say it. Was devastated by her absence by the absence of Ramnath on her 18th birthday. Ramnath reached home 3 days after Ava’s birthday. On February first. After Ramnath arrived in home, Ava told her dad, “Dad I want to be a model, I promise I will make you proud so please let me be a model”
Ramnath felt numb for a second and slapped Ava and said, “Either you stay in this house and become a successful doctor or an engineer or live in the streets and become a model and forget that you even had parents.”
Ava was broken by Ramnath’s words. Anjali tried to take her daughter’s support but her in-law’s were against Anjali. Anjali continued her studies and started preparing for her unwanted life. She cracked her NEET exam but she didn't want to continue her life in suffocation. But she had no choice but to kill her dreams and continue killing her true self day by day. First day of her college, scared, worried, angry and suffocated by her own life. She sat in the second seat. Soon a girl came and sat beside her. She introduced herself as Shamita Pant. Shamita asked, “excited?” Ava replied with a dark guilt and pain in her face, “ Nope”. That was it for the whole day. Shamita tried talking to her but she always said, “ I’m not a social person, please!” and hearing this Shamita backed off. One day after the classes were over Ava left in a hurry. Shamita saw something fall off Ava's bag. It was a pack of pills. Shamita went to the nearest pharmacy and asked about it. Ava was taking depression pills.
Shamita decided to talk to her but, instead Ava was furious and told Shamita not to tell anything to anyone. Days continued. Ava started skipping classes and locking herself in her room.
One day Ava told her parents that she wanted to take a room in college for better concentration. Ramnath immediately said yes.
Ava started taking a double dose of the medication. One day Ava called her parents and said, “ Ma, I think you guys should visit my hostel, it’s beautiful.” They were delighted and they said, “ Why not, Ava, We’ll come next Saturday.”
After that Ava borrowed a pen from Shamita and wrote “ Life is Hard, isn’t it Shamita?” in Shamita’s diary. And Shamita wrote in reply, “ Haha, yes it is!”...
Next Saturday, Ava was lying in her bed and the door was open. Her parents came in and saw Ava sleeping and saw a piece of paper under her pillow.
